Child of the street July 19, 2005
On the way to the office, my cab stopped at a red light. On cue, a grubby kid—looking helpless, hungry, miserable—appeared on the cab’s passenger window, begging for money.
I’m torn between giving and not giving. I’m afraid the light will turn green the minute I open the window and hand over the money. I’m scared that he’ll grab my bag. I’m eating and I do not want to dirty my hands. I feel guilty that I’m having cheeseburger and fries, inside the cool interior of the cab while he swelters outside, so I act as if I do not see him.
I know I sound callous and unfeeling. The thing is, the burger is my lunch and I’m in a cab because after a whole morning of work at home to catch up with deadlines I’m running late for a 4 p.m. meeting. I just hate the way these children make me feel.
Marlen, my husband used to give money to children begging on the streets in the intersection of San Miguel Ave and Saw Blvd here. There was even a time he told the kids to organize themselves at the nearest Caltex and he bought them hotdogs in buns. However, one night, we saw the same bunch of kids loitering around the same place and sniffing something from a bag. Rugby, what else! He got so angry that he never gave anything to any beggar unless they are maimed or something.
i ignore those children too. i also ignore the adults, especially the badjaos with children in their arms to be used as “puhunan” for begging, the blind men and the cripple begging on the streets. no one should be allowed to beg there. first of all, they’re traffic hazards. if they get run over, the driver gets all the blame although they shouldn’t be there at all. second, it’s not good for anyone’s soul. the beggar thinks he’s good for nothing and has to depend on the “kindness” of strangers to feed himself. people like marlen, meanwhile, feel guilty about not giving. but giving only encourages those beggars. i once read about this blind man who made furniture in some mountain barangay in southern cebu in order to feed his family. if that blind man can work, why can’t these badjaos do the same. some children sell rags on the street. i buy from them, almost every week. but i refuse to dole out hard-earned money to people who do nothing but beg.
alma and karen, i think i’m beginning to learn how to ignore them without feeling guilty.